Airing of the Grievances: Automotive Edition

December 24th, 2010

Yes, it’s Christmas Eve, but many folks in these parts choose to celebrate Festivus too (or instead).

In 1997, “Seinfeld” introduced the concept of Festivus to a public looking for a less-commercial way to celebrate the holidays; a “Festivus for the rest of us.”

The Festivus celebration begins with an “Airing of the Grievances,” so let’s gather around the aluminium pole and air the auto-related grievances that offend you most. The Fesitvus feast and Feats of Strength will have to wait for another day…

Below are ten of my grievances, in no particular order. Please feel free to add yours in the comments section!

1. Drivers who apply brakes before turning on their turn signals.

2. The Honda CR-Z.

3. Insurance companies that refuse to acknowledge fault of their insured drivers.

4. MPG ratings on electric cars. Find another system!

5. Studded snow tires. People drive on them for three months and only really need them for thee days.

6. Drivers who run red lights at a photo-controlled intersection and then complain about getting a ticket in the mail.

7. Getting a ticket in the mail without running a red light.

8. Not being able to afford an Aston Martin V12 Vanquish.

9. The people who can afford an Aston Martin V12 Vanquish but don’t have the proper driving skills to appreciate it.

10. People who refuse to learn how to drive a car with a manual transmission.

Merry Christmas, Happy Festivus and Happy Holidays! What are you automotive grievances?

-tgriffith

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  1. randy
    December 27th, 2010 at 12:59 | #1

    3. Insurance companies that refuse to acknowledge fault of their insured drivers. (They only refuse to acknowledge their driver’s fault to you. They rack up their rates within ten seconds of the accident.)

    4. MPG ratings on electric cars. Find another system! how about Kilowatt-miles? Really, any measure of energy can be translated into another, even gasoline.)

    Here’s mine:
    Drivers who don’t know basic “how to” of driving, such as how to use a left turn lane, how to turn a corner properly, how to signal, how to stop at a light, keep a safe following distance, drive a safe speed for conditions, etc.
    Car companies that insist on setting up all their advertised “deals” for employees. Most of us don’t work for a car company, and being baraged with employee-only deals pisses people off. It’s like Macy’s constantly putting out advertisements for sales open only to their employees. STUPID
    Gas companies that suddenly jack up prices 25 cents or more per gallon for no apparent reason.
    The Michigan legislature who continues to pander to the trucking companies with the highest weight limits on trucks in the country. The result is the worst roads in the country and higher death and injury rates in truck accidents.
    Cops who like to write tickets to motorists for violating laws they don’t obey themselves.
    TOYOTA, who melted down in 2010 and got record fines from the government for repeatedly trying to cover up safety defects.
    For the federal government for not mandating proper seats and seat belts on all school buses.
    Hip hop stars who think it’s newsworthy to stuff an expensive car with piles of cash to send the message that they’re better than us poor schnooks who can’t even afford the down payment on a Maserati. My they all get jeep seat.
    I could go on and on, but Festivus dignity restrains.

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