Wacky Traffic Laws: Can You Spot the Fakes?

Illegal? Maybe...

The good people at Yahoo Autos recently ran a feature on the 10 weirdest traffic laws in the United States. There are some doozies on the list, some of which I’ve included below.

In the spirit of April Fool’s Day, among the real laws are a few I’ve completely made up that exist nowhere but in the deep abscesses of my mind.

Think you can identify the real laws, or is this another example where truth is stranger than fiction?

1. In Kansas, it is illegal to screech your tires. More accurately, “unnecessary rapid acceleration, unnecessary tire squeal, skid, smoke or slide upon acceleration or stopping including the casting of tread, gravel, dirt or other road surface materials from the tires” is illegal.

Wannabe drifters and drag racers face a $500 fine and/or 30 days of imprisonment.

2. In Eureka, California, you can’t curl up on the coziest boulevard for a snooze, because it is unlawful to sleep in the street.

Should you try it, and manage to get caught before being run over, you’ll face a fine of up to $1,000 and/or up to six months in jail.

3. Animal lovers on vacation beware of the city of Tacoma in Washington state. The northwest novelty requires all occupants of a vehicle to be buckled up, including pets.

Caught with a curious but free-roaming cat in the car? Prepare to pay the $500 fine.

4. Donut lovers in Maine need to beware of the Dunkin Donuts store on Main Street in South Berwick. Park in front of the store, or within 25 feet of it, and you will be ticketed.

The penalty is a fine of up to $175 and/or jail time of up to 30 days. That’s an expensive donut.

5. If you’re pulled over in the wide-open state of Wyoming, be prepared with not just your driver’s licence, registration and proof of insurance, but your vehicle’s service history report, too. It is now required as part of the Wyoming Highway Patrol’s effort to curb unsafe vehicles from rattling down its highways.

Caught without proof of regular maintenance? You’ll take the next tow-truck to the nearest service station.

6. If heading to the Hamptons section of Long Island has you in the mood to get nude, don’t take your clothes off inside your car.

Disrobing in public is, of course, forbidden, but so is being naked in the semi-privacy of your own vehicle.

The penalty is a fine of up to $100 and/or jail time up to three months.

7. Head to the great state of Hawaii and be sure you don’t drink and drive. Sure, that’s a familiar law in all 50 states, but in Aloha Nation it goes a step further. Really, no drinking and driving. That includes Diet Coke, Starbucks and the 72-oz. Guava Slurpees needed to stay cool in the Hawaiian sun. Hawaii Governor Neil Abercrombie said of the law, “It might sound extreme, but many of our roads border the ocean with little barrier. We don’t want folks who are unfamiliar with driving here concentrating on their drinks, missing a turn and driving into the Pacific.”

While drivers can’t be pulled over specifically for slurping while driving, officers can tack an extra $250 fine onto a primary offense ticket.

8. In Minnesota, it is illegal to drive dirty. Specifically, a truck or other vehicle whose wheels or tires “deposit mud, dirt, sticky substances, litter or other material on any street or highway.”

All violations of the code are subject to a massively sticky fine of $2,000.

Which of the eight traffic laws above are fakes? (I’ll update this post next week with the answers.)

-tgriffith

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