Joe Johnson’s Obscene Truck: What Does It Prove?

Joe Johnson's truck

As far as professional athletes go, it’s not uncommon to see million-dollar rides filling up their 32-car garages.

Ferraris, Aston Martins, Bentleys and Rolls-Royces are familiar sights among the richest of the athlete elite, so it’s a little refreshing to see something slightly unconventional tote around a rich and famous basketballer.

Just don’t confuse “unconventional” with “practical,” because the rig Atlanta Hawk Joe Johnson recently pulled up to his alma mater in is anything but attainable for the rest of us.

While I’ve never heard of this beast, it seems it first made news in 2007. According to Dime Magazine, it is a Ford F-650 that has:

– 55-inch tires
– Three TV screens (one in the dash and two in between the seat rows hanging from the ceiling)
– The gas tank holds 200 gallons of diesel fuel
– Equipped with cameras in the front, back and on both sides
– Has a train horn
– Back seat folds down into a bed

It has a train horn.

Another F-650. Not sure who owns this one...

I suppose I should be outraged at the inefficient and opulent display of environmental murder this rig commits, especially if it’s Johnson’s daily driver. But I’m not. The inner 12-year-old in me thinks this thing is pure awesome. I mean really, a train horn? That’s the stuff of fantasy, even more so than the instant bed in the back.

Johnson pulled up to the University of Arkansas recently to teach a kids’ basketball camp in his big rig, reportedly resulting in a flurry of questions about how much it cost. He didn’t answer, but we can assume it was a pretty penny considering Johnson owns one of the richest contracts in NBA history.

Whatever it cost, Joe Johnson’s big rig doesn’t leave much room for argument against raising taxes on the rich, does it?


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1 Comment

  1. It proves what Joe wants to prove:
    1. He has a lot of money and is too stupid to spend it wisely.
    2. He’s insecure and needs to prove his worth with possessions.
    3. He’s amoral.
    4. He’s got no class or taste.
    5. He’s better than you are.
    In other words, just another facet of soul-less America that meaures everything in terms of money.

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