How to Sell a Used Car: Be Manly

1997 Jeep Wrangler

The days of selling used cars with a three-line classified ad are over.

No longer can we simply give a year, make, model, mileage and short feature list—we must turn our used car into an experience. We must describe our car so anyone who reads about it will become so emotionally involved they’d be crazy to pass up an opportunity to own such a life-enhancing piece of machinery.

Your used car shouldn’t be just another used car in the never-ending sea of used cars. It should stand out, it should be marketed as a one-of-a-kind vehicle that will give its new owner a sense of having real superpowers.

Or at least make him feel more manly than he ever thought possible.

A friend of mine posted a link to an online ad on Facebook, which was then taken down and then re-posted here. The 1997 Jeep Wrangler Sahara could have been sold like any other Jeep available on the market, but it wasn’t. The description is worthy of a Hollywood screenplay, as the seller promises an experience that guarantees to put hair on an otherwise bare chest.

This baby’s pulse is pumping 4.0 liters of uncensored raw fuel through her straight six nuclear power plant. And rest assured this is no metro feminine automatic. . .you command her to obey, with your calloused hand planted firmly on the shifter. And she will obey, the first time, every time. If you can’t handle your stick shifter, or reach the clutch pedal, you better not ferry skip over here wanting to test drive her. If you stall her out, you can count on getting hit in the face with a piece of re-bar and sent back where you came from.

And it goes on. And on. Rather than just stating the mileage, the seller says,

This jeep has carried me through 155,000 miles of battlefield twice as gruesome as the second half of the movie 300.

Now that’s how you describe a car.

Want to take your shot at writing the best car ad ever? Skip on over to the CarGurus used listings and post yours, for free.

Do creative ads like this make you more likely to purchase a used car?


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Used Jeep Wrangler

1 Comment

  1. Wow, any savvy buyer knows to avoid these over-dramatized sellers. As with any excessive ad hype, it’s there to cover up the gruesome truth. In this case, a worn out rolling junk heap that is overpriced. Sellers often miss the most important item of information: Mileage. Follow with price, other important tidbits like a salvage title, and anything that stands out as a plus (like nice wheels and new tires) or minus (like a dent in the back or leaky muffler system). Potential buyers that know what they’re looking for will decide what to look at based on such information. BS artists usually don’t get much interest because most potential buyers recognize snake oil when they see it.

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